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AVY LEE ROTH: AS GOOD AS HER “DADDY” DAVE?
By Fayner | July 21, 2008
We all know David Lee Roth is not the father of Avy Lee Roth despite what she (and possibly Diamond Dave, too, depends on how much attention he needs) tells you about it. I proved it years ago when she told me DLR and her mother fucked while Van Halen played Spain on their 1979 tour to promote Van Halen 2. Van Halen never played Spain during that tour and at the time she says Dave and her mother fucked Van Halen was playing in either Boulder, Colorado or Kalamazoo, Michigan.
But it was a cool scam, sure. Avy deserves whatever attention she’s gotten from her lie. I’m sorry I had to go and spoil the whole thing for her, but I must always protect Van Halen from the evil powers that be and this will probably be the thing that ends up killing me.
Sweet.
Okay, so to the reason we’re talking about Avy: It seems she has written some lyrics that equal even DLR’s from the band’s heyday.
Are you ready for it?
Here it goes.
Can we get a little drum beat?
That’s good.
“on Ebay!!
limited edition!!!
search Avy Lee Roth skateaboard !!
xoxoxoxo”
This was found in a Myspace bulletin under the subject “get your Avy Lee Rot deck now!!” and I’m now thinking that even though I’ve already proved they are not related the fact that she can’t even spell her own name kinda makes me think even further that there ain’t no way Avy is related to the once-great wordsmith Diamond David Lee Roth.
Compare Avy’s lyrics above to the following VH and make up your own mind about the whole thing despite my proof.
“Found that girl with
a lonesome john
When she should
have been with me
Guess that woman fall in love
She don’t work for free”
(ed note: and yes, I see that the web site I stole the picture of Avy from is HornySpanishFlies and Spanish Fly is the name off of Van Halen 2 and that was the tour they were on when she was supposedly conceived, but it is purely a coincidence, okay?)
Topics: Story |
July 21st, 2008 at 1:42 pm
There was another MySpace chick named Breena(who works in low budget/no budget horror films) who was also using the Lee Roth last name and promoted herself as Breena Lee Roth,but nowadays promotes herself as Breena Roth,for this shows you how some folks can claim to be the illigiterate offspring of a certain celebrity,but they actually aren’t.