Archive for June, 2008
« Previous EntriesMUST BE SOMETHING IN THE WATER
Monday, June 30th, 2008Someone emailed me this link to a XXXPornTalk thread regarding whether or not I’m still doing drugs on a major level because of some of the things I’ve been writing about lately. This is his argument:
The fact that He’s hanging out with Testa debating whether women would be better with tails is telling. Check out some [...]
RESPONDING TO JEREMY STEELE
Monday, June 30th, 2008I wrote about Jeremy Steele the other day, but for once it was all good things. I wrote about how Jeremy will fuck any chick no matter what she looks like. I thought of it as an awesome quality to possess, one that I certainly do not have.
But Jeremy commented on the story and was [...]
HOW BAD OFF ARE WE?
Monday, June 30th, 2008I knew this recession was going to be tough for lots of people. Not me, of course, as advertising revenue on porn gossip web sites is at an all-time high.
Basically, I thought all this recession was gonna do is bring more hot chicks into the porn business and maybe a few cat fights outside a [...]
JEREMY STEELE WILL DO IT!
Friday, June 27th, 2008Jeremy Steele is a class act. He will fuck any chick, any where, any time for any price. That deserves admiration and respect if you ask me.
Jeremy I’ve just learned also performed in something called Squirt Bukkake in which a guy gets a faceful of chick cum AKA urine. I didn’t really look at the picture [...]
TMZ’S PULITZER-WORTHY STORY OF THE DAY
Friday, June 27th, 2008When I saw this story on TMZ’s show last night, I was floored to the point of not being able to move my arms and legs for a few minutes. I assumed it was total shock, and when my numbness finally subsided I rushed over to my computer to check out the TMZ web site [...]
SKY LOPEZ WRITING A BOOK?
Thursday, June 26th, 2008That’s what her myspace page said the other day; that she is currently working on her book about her struggles to find GOD or something kooky like that.
But all the power to her, right? I mean, its not like she was doing too well before she found GOD, she may as well give the big [...]
SAN FRANCISCO HAS THE RIGHT IDEA
Thursday, June 26th, 2008Okay, now this is one of them stories you can never make up. Too good.
The Presidential Memorial Commission of San Francisco has asked voters to allow them to change the name of a water treatment plant to the George W. Bush Sewage Plant.
Really? ‘Cause this would be so awesome if it actually happened.
Many of you may think [...]
CUTE SLUT MAKES PORN MOVIE
Wednesday, June 25th, 2008The first time I saw a Nautica Thorn scene was in the Barrett Blade’s flick Keepers a couple of years back, and I must say since that day I have been a fan.
Not the kind of fan that waits outside in the rain with a bunch of horny old pervs to get her autograph, but a fan [...]
HAPPY BIRTHDAY ROBBYE BENTLEY
Wednesday, June 25th, 2008Sure, Robbye and I have had our differences over the years, but I figure her sweet set of tits is reason enough for me to tell her I’m sorry and make everything better…especially on her Birthday which is today.
May she take beautiful pictures of slutty women forever and ever and ever and ever and always [...]
WHEN WORLDS COLLIDE
Wednesday, June 25th, 2008I got a press release from J Mull telling me that Not The Bradys XXX director Will Ryder met legendary Brady Bunch creator Sherwood Scwartz’s son, Lloyd, at a recent showing of A Very Brady Musical in Los Angeles.
Fun stuff.
And although I usually rewrite press releases, I’ve decided not out of pure laziness but out [...]
WHEN RETARDED PEOPLE DO PORN
Tuesday, June 24th, 2008From what I’ve heard, there was a time in this business when nearly all the female talent came from the worst of conditions. There was no fame. There was no real money. There was just nowhere else to go.
Now, porn is a business, and somewhere along the line between then and now some chick said [...]
STUDY: JENNA JAMESON CAUSED RECESSION
Monday, June 23rd, 2008AP - Everyone knew that porngraphy was a big business. But this big?
Studies have shown that on the exact day XXX legend Jenna Jameson announced her retirement from the business, America also began its recent recession.
Coincidence?
Hardly. Jenna Jameson was a huge porn star, her movies grossing millions of dollars per year. But enough to impact [...]
PAM ANDERSON WANTS ME
Monday, June 23rd, 2008So last night Taylor, Keith and I went to see that Zohan movie. Taylor saw it two nights before, but like the pregnant ex-porn superstar told me as we stood in line in Calabasas, “Fuck it! So what if I just saw it! Junk food, air conditioning and a giant television! Holla!!!”
After the movie, we’re [...]
IT AIN’T AS EASY AS IT LOOKS
Monday, June 23rd, 2008I’ve seen lots of porn gossip writers come and go since I started in the business back in 2000. I bet people like Gene Ross and Tod Hunter and even Luke Ford have seen lots more than me. But I’ve seen plenty.
Over the years I’ve almost been fired from the helm at Lukeford by some of [...]
TMZ HUGE STORY OF THE WEEK!
Friday, June 20th, 2008Oh my God, I just can’t like believe it! Really? Wow!
Usually, TMZ is stuffed with crap-filled crap about celebrities, but today I actually found an awesome story on the stupid web site.
It appears that - gasp - Tim McGraw was in West Hollywood yesterday with his family and was photographed eating a piece of pizza!
Can [...]
THE HITLER GUIDED TOUR
Friday, June 20th, 2008Sure, Hitler was evil and a big meanie if you ask me, but no one can argue that he didn’t lead an interesting life to say the least.
Right?
I mean, if it wasn’t for the mighty hand of the good ol’ U.S. of A., he could have taken over the World. The Whole Wide World (that is, unless [...]
NICE AD CAMPAIGN
Friday, June 20th, 2008Okay, this guy in the picture is creeping me out ’cause he looks like David Lee Roth does with that perma-smile not sure if he’s crazy look.
Let’s move on.
I was watching television for inspiration as I usually do. I sit there and stare blankly at whatever I’m watching until I come up with something to [...]
BIANCA DAGGER HELPS DURING OUR RECESSION
Friday, June 20th, 2008Money is tight these days for everyone except those who are good friends with Bush and Cheney and profit off death and oil. I know it. You know it. Bianca Dagger knows it, too.
You see, Bianca believes that every man deserves a good haircut and a lap dance. Even in a recession.
That is why Bianca, [...]
DOES THIS LOOK LIKE THE FACE OF A HATEFUL PERSON?
Thursday, June 19th, 2008I have this fan from Italy named Topopiperno who isn’t too versed in the English language but tries nonetheless with his emails to my MySpace account. And although he may seem a little weird to us, he is still a human being and deserves our respect. Actually, I’m just scared TR will get mad at [...]
WHAT DID THE GAY PEOPLE DO NOW??
Thursday, June 19th, 2008I was reading today about a growing epidemic in Cape Cod, Massachusetts where public sex in sand dunes has become rampant and blatant without any regard for the public.
Yes, I’m talking about gay sex in Provencetown. P-Town, as it is know in Massachusetts, is home of the gay, land of the fag. It is on [...]
CHEAPER THAN A HOOKER
Thursday, June 19th, 2008A Japanese (of course) company has just come out with a 15 inch tall love robot for lonely men.
No, I’m serious. But it is not the chick in the picture, that would be too awesome. Instead, you get this
I’d rather have the chick in the picture, but what are you gonna do when you’re super [...]
WHAT THE FUCK IS THIS?
Thursday, June 19th, 2008I grabbed a bunch of old Hustler Magazines last week to yank out the centerfolds and use them as wrapping paper for Staci’s birthday gift (a yoga mat), and came across a picture of this chick Daisy Tanks on one of the pages that weren’t stuck together.
Are you serious? Is this what porn has come [...]
HELP ME, GORDON RAMSAY!
Thursday, June 19th, 2008I’m not gonna lie to you: I like Gordon Ramsay. And not like like, just like. I enjoy how he crushes the dreams of people in such a rude way. You could say I’m envious of him: He’s made a great career for himself by working hard.
So lately I’ve gotten into the BBC show where [...]
WE DID IT!
Wednesday, June 18th, 2008My role in the Celtic’s victory last night was a crucial one. I was the guy who sat near the television cheering for them. I know they could hear me. I know they could feel my passion and desire to win the NBA Finals. And I know that they know that the reason they really [...]
WHO’S GONNA PLAY GOPHER?
Wednesday, June 18th, 2008J Mull and Scott David and X-Play are producing spoofs on The Love Boat and Three’s Company in the coming months; both classic television shows with tons of potential in the XXX market. Three’s Company pretty much writes itself as the show could very well have been a low budget porn movie had it not been [...]
THE FLY
Wednesday, June 18th, 2008I came across the movie I did for VCA a few years ago titled Sloppy ‘Hos as seen above. I’m not sure what the cover means but at the time I must have had a reason to put Nadia Styles in a giant cereal bowl.
Anyhoo, I was checking it out to see how awesome I [...]
SURE, SUNNY LANE DOES FUNNY POSES, BUT SHE SURE WORKS HARD!
Wednesday, June 18th, 2008I don’t think I’ve ever seen a picture of Sunny Lane not doing a silly pose. I guess its her thing. Good for her. It always makes me smile and that is hard to do after working in the business for eight years. I can just imagine how painful it is for those who’ve been [...]
ITS EITHER A SMALL WORLD OR I’M A BIG STAR!
Tuesday, June 17th, 2008I made the final arrangements today to have Rhiannon’s ashes delivered to me from the Cremation guy.
“Let me ask you something,” he said. “What do you do for a living?”
“I’m a writer.”
“What kind of stuff?”
“Magazine, internet. Porn, mostly.”
“I knew it! When you first said your name I was like, Is this the same Fayner? And [...]
WOULD WOMEN BE BETTER WITH TAILS?
Monday, June 16th, 2008So when Testa and I were in full discussion about the Kung Fu Panda Gay Happy Meal thing, I noticed the long tail on the tiger who had his ass in the air begging for hard cock.
Wouldn’t a tail be cool on chicks? I asked him. Good balance! And if they fall off the bed [...]
BARELY LEGAL BABY FAT! NOW THAT’S A TREAT!
Monday, June 16th, 2008Let me tell you how great being on the Hustler Video screener list is: It is so great, let me tell you! Oh boy, is it gonna be one of these stories? Yup, I think so.
Barely Legal has made lots of penises shoot semen over the years. Many women have tickled their soaked vaginas watching [...]
IS THE NEW MCDONALDS KUNG FU PANDA HAPPY MEAL GAY?
Monday, June 16th, 2008TR came over yesterday with two McDonalds Happy Meals featuring the new Kung Fu Panda toy which is the tiger and you do this thing and he flips over and lands back on his feet. But one of them didn’t quite work right and kept landing in the “fuck me from behind” pose while the other landed [...]
HAPPY FATHERS DAY
Sunday, June 15th, 2008Great way to distract all FATHERS today…. there’s US Open Golf Final Round, NBA Finals Game 5 and then there’s THIS.
WHY THE FRENCH SUCK REASON #74
Friday, June 13th, 2008Some of you like me don’t remember World War Two. But from what I hear and read it wasn’t as fun as Summer Camp which I thought was super fun and wish I could go back to those days but I can’t so I’ll just write about it and make you think about it too [...]
SHOULD I DO IT?
Friday, June 13th, 2008I know, I know, I’ll never live as long as Keith Richards nor do as many drugs as he’s done, but one thing for sure is I’ve snorted a lot of stranger things than he has. Well, maybe not…but I did snort pancake mix and twice I did Brown-Brown’s which are cocaine and gun powder.
But [...]
HAPPY BIRTHDAY ALAURA EDEN!!!
Friday, June 13th, 2008Everyone here at ScottFayner.com (well, there’s me, and me, and me) wishes to wish Alaura AKA Staci a very happy birthday today! Not sure what’s going on exactly besides the petting zoo, but I’m sure there will be some sushi involved and some lap dances probably if I remember back to her party last year [...]
A MANS WORST FEAR
Friday, June 13th, 2008Daryl Zutt was on a pig hunting and fishing trip with a friend in northern Queensland when he pulled over by the side of the road.
Crouching down to answer nature’s call, he felt a sharp sting to his manhood. Moments later he saw a brown snake – one of [...]
HUGH HEFNER GETS BODY PARTS FOR BIRTHDAY
Friday, June 13th, 2008Hugh Hefner’s girlfriend gave him a chocolate mold of her butt for his birthday.
The 82-year-old Playboy magazine mogul, who has three live-in lovers, was thrilled to receive the elaborate “chocolate starfish” from girlfriend Kendra Wilkinson.
She said: “We gave him chocolate body parts. We moulded our body parts and gave it to him, and he ate [...]
I’M NOT SURE WHAT IT IS, BUT I BET IT’LL BE FUN
Thursday, June 12th, 2008So I get this press invite for tomorrow night for a movie and after-party at Hustler Hollywood following the screening of the Los Angeles premiere of Lloyd Kaufman’s Poultrygeist, Night of The Chicken Dead. Sweet. Now if someone could tell me what it is?
This is from the invite and may help you further understand what [...]
YOU’LL HIT A HOME RUN ONE DAY, SLUGGER…
Thursday, June 12th, 2008I did my weekly trek over to my old stomping ground Lukeford.com just to make sure the new guy ain’t ruining my name too badly.
Well, he did.
Ryan Rayzer, if that is his real name, has apparently unearthed some shocking news about Eva Angelina that no one before has known about. Yes, its true.
According to Rayzer, [...]
FROM THE COMMENTS
Thursday, June 12th, 2008I don’t know, I get a lot of bogus spam or something comments from some casino/insurance scam I guess and most of them are really bad and I don’t approve them but this one I found quite funny and decided to let it slide. It reads:
Great Website! It helps me a lot with my tough [...]
IF YOU HAVE A PET, NOW IS THE TIME TO LOVE THEM
Wednesday, June 11th, 2008Got word from August that her beloved cat Tinker passed away yesterday. Its been a rough week, what with Rhiannon heading to Doggie Heaven and now this… And they say these things come in three’s, so if you have a pet that you love you should show them how much you care and if you [...]
THANKS, JONNI DARKKO!
Wednesday, June 11th, 2008Truth is, before my birthday party I hadn’t seen Mr. Darkko in a long, long time. We had lost touch. But after Rhi died he sent me a nice text and invited me for lunch yesterday over at Kabuki in Woodland Hills. We had a very nice chat, which I will not tell you about [...]
LUKEISBACKISBACK
Wednesday, June 11th, 2008Did you see the funny thing TheRealLukeFord wrote on his old site today?
Luke Ford here. ([email protected])
Lukeisback.com and its entire contents are for sale.
My deal with the previous operators fell through (they found writing the site too much work and they prefered to concentrate on ventures that made them more money) and today they gave me [...]
GINA LYNN IN NEW BAM MARGERA MOVIE
Wednesday, June 11th, 2008I guess former Jackass Bam Margera and his motley crue of retards have made a movie titled Minghags The Movie but don’t bother going to the site ’cause it ain’t there yet. But the poster of the movie with smut slut Gina Lynn clearly in view can be seen HERE.
Good for her.
NOW THAT’S JUST PLUM DISGUSTING
Wednesday, June 11th, 2008If you were to say to me, “Fayner, what is it you think about all day long?” I’d have to answer that what I think about all day every day goes as follows: my dog(s), cocaine and porn. It’s pretty sad, I know, but that’s just how my brain is working these days, especially since [...]
TWO OUT OF THREE PORN CHICKS SAY: “MMMM GOOD!”
Tuesday, June 10th, 2008Some of you Massachusetts people may know of the famous Chateau Restaurant in lovely Waltham. I know I do. Some of the best marinara sauce in the world! Well, my good buddy Jason AKA Mystery Cock along with his family own and operate the wonderful eatery that has been serving meals since 1933.
Anyway, a few [...]
WELL, TESTA HAS BEEN OUT OF TOWN!
Tuesday, June 10th, 2008First I hear that Tony Testa is gong out of town. Then I read today that a raw roasting chicken in Connecticut was found on the side of the road with a pipe bomb stuffed in it. Then I remembered that Testa is from Connecticut, and he likes to put things in chickens.
I may call [...]
ANAL TRAINING? BUT TO DO WHAT?
Tuesday, June 10th, 2008I just got my copy of Hustler Video’s Anal Training directed by that Italian hunk of a man, Axel Braun.
I knew before even putting the DVD in my computer that Anal Training would have tons of anal in it; and not just because of the title. Axel Braun seems to like two things only: Making [...]
ONE CRAZY PORN CHICK
Monday, June 9th, 2008Okay, so a while ago I downloaded like 500 scenes from the Naughty America site for a rainy day when I was feeling lonely and needed a boost. The other day I felt, hey, what the hell, my best friend is dead and I should feel better for only a moment right? and went searching [...]
AN OLD INTERVIEW WITH RHIANNON
Monday, June 9th, 2008This was taken from Lukeford archives back in March of 2006.
FAYNER First off, let me say what an honor it is being able to be part of your first interview. We’ll start with the basics, okay? Tell us where you’re from and how old you are.
RHIANNON I believe I was promised a steak first, right?
FAYNER [...]