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DOES DOLLY PARTON OWE HER LOOKS TO JESUS?
By Fayner | April 3, 2008
I recall a joke from years ago back when I was just a young kid that went something like this: What do you call the liquid on Dolly Parton’s chest? Mountain Dew.
Yeah, I know, it’s quite lame, but I didn’t make it up. Someone else should be punished for it and not me.
Anyway, Dolly was on American Idol last night singing her new song, Jesus and Gravity. The title, she says, refers to her belief that Jesus brings her up and gravity holds her down.
But have you seen Dolly Parton lately? The legendary singer is in her 60s and looks fucking awesome! Dez and I both agreed that if given the chance we’d have anal sex with Dolly Parton.
But now I must ask: Is it really Jesus that is lifting Dolly Parton up?
Or is it a true savior, some hot-shot plastic surgeon in Beverly Hills capable of turning an old red neck singer into a wrinkle-free, (still) awesome-boobed blonde bombshell?
I’d go with the latter.
Dolly should change the name of the song to Plastic Surgeon and Gravity. That would make better sense.
Topics: Story |
April 3rd, 2008 at 8:55 am
Straight to the A!