Scott Fayner Gossip and Blog

Minutes ago, the dogs let me know that they had to go out into the driveway and use the restroom, so I went to open the door.

But before I could, La Bella rushed in front of me and began barking at a guy walking up to the door. I opened the door. Corey Haim was standing there. He had a sweaty tank top on which showed all his amazing tattoos like the Bat Man on his arm.

“Hi, I’m Corey,” he said, offering his hand to shake. For some reason or another I did. His hand was soaked with sweat. His jaw was moving faster than Smokie when I try hitting her with the broom after she’s done something super crappy. That’s pretty fast.

He was high on speed. He still is. Poor kid.

It looks as though he’s traded down to a Jeep Wrangler from his Hummer, unless he crashed it and it was someone else’s car. He looks retarded enough to crash a Hummer.

Anyway, he was picking up one of the chicks who live here now. You know you’re no longer a star when you have to drive all the way to the depths of the Valley to have a chick hang out with you.

I’m watching the new Paris Hilton show on MTV where she looks for a new best friend forever! It is mighty lame but somehow I can’t seem to look away.

What really irks me is this guy(?) Richie Rich (pictured) who just takes the whole “I’m gay! Look at me as I act gay! What ultra-gay thing will I do next?” trend - the one that just won’t seem to go away - just a bit too far.

I mean, I can see anyone who enjoys things in their mouth that are remincent of bananas and kiwis as being a little fruity, but when a gay guy is acting more like a chick than an actual chick it brings shivers down my spine.

Be gay, I don’t give a shit. But this fag is just way too faggy all the time.

It is annoying, and I’m embarassed as an American to come from the same country as this donkey. Freedom of Expression is wonderful and all, but there is a limit to freedom and this cock-thirsty clown crossed the line with the red 80s wicked witch boots if you ask me.

Did you see this video?

A man beat the snot out of a teen girl in line at McDonald’s over who was next to order.

Seriously?

Check out the video here

There is a group called Nuts for Mutts and they’re trying to raise money to help dogs in need of a home as well as turn abandoned canines into therapy dogs.

It is a 3.1 mile walk on October 19th.

I’m walking in Rhiannon’s name which I think she would have wanted me to do if she was still alive.

Won’t you support Rhiannon by sponsoring us in this event? I’m planning on filling my pockets with her ashes so she can be there with us.

My personal page is located here if you’d like to help out. I’ll throw up Taylor’s page, too, once she tells me what it is. I’m sure you’d all rather support her than me. Either way, the dogs win, so I don’t care.

Thanks and I hope to be getting your money soon.

The creepy thing is I always had a thing for little Tabitha in the original Bewitched series.

Well, back then it wasn’t that creepy ’cause I was a little kid myself when I imagined being her lover.

Now when I remember this I feel a tad creepy, ’cause I’m an old man and an old man thinking about a little girl is wrong unless if you ask Quasarman’s neighbor and in that case old men touching little girls is a good thing.

But really, its not.

But I’m so stoked that in the Not Bewitched XXX movie Tabitha has been put under some spell and is now an 18 year old hottie played by Teagan Presley.

Actually, since me and her are friends I’m not too stoked she’s in this role because I can’t imagine playing with myself while watching a friend on film.

Okay, I’ll try it, but I’m telling you I don’t think it will work too well.

But I’ll try.

And to further make this release an epic event, XCritic.com has teamed up with the Not Bewitched XXX team to give away some cool muthafuckin’ prizes…

One grand prize is a 10 minute dirty phone call from Teagan. The other is a personalized 10 minute jerkoff tape from Sunny Lane. A bunch of others will get free DVDs of the movie. Go to the XCritic site for more information.

So lately I’ve been really missing Rhiannon. She just made everything brighter, more alive to me. Now everything seems lame and dead.

But I’m trying to push on, I really am. I don’t want to be one of them people who mourns their dead dog for years and years.

Yesterday afternoon, I was in one of my moods, so I decided to trek all the way around the corner to Barrett and Testa’s place to clear my head. The house was being used for a porn shoot and there were workers and performers lingering about.

When I walked through the back gate, Christian was in the pool with some skank.

“Awesome!” I shouted. “I was hoping to see your dick today! And here it is!”

And then I was introduced to the chick, who said her name was Rhiannon Something or Something Rhiannon I can’t really recall but all I know is it again made me think of my dead dog and that is never good when standing in front of a naked chick.

And just like Rhiannon Bray before her, this new Rhiannon is also not as good looking as my late canine companion. I thought about telling her exactly this, but instead I had to again see Christian’s dick floating in the pool.

“Has it gotten smaller since the last time I saw you?” I asked him as I walked inside to chug some vodka in hopes of vanishing the sight of man meat in the pool from my memory.