Archive for March, 2008
« Previous EntriesHA HA HA HA HA
Monday, March 31st, 2008Okay so newbie Winter Sky came over today to talk World of Warcraft with Dez. She brought her little puppy Corso and we were out in the driveway watching our dogs team up on it.
“So I did a scene today for Hypno Zombie Slaves,” Winter told us.
“Were you really hypnotized?” Testa asked.
“No, but they told […]
A FUNNY TONY TESTA STORY FROM A MEXICAN WHOREHOUSE #15
Monday, March 31st, 2008Stopped by Barrett and Testa’s house today ’cause Tony wanted to give me his Duff Beer jacket from The Simpsons which probably means he’s gonna be asking me for a huge favor in the next couple of days. Also, they were cleaning out the garage and wanted me to do manual labor.
Somehow, like most times, […]
WHAT’S WRONG WITH ME?
Monday, March 31st, 2008Okay, so I woke up early just like every fucking day at around seven. It hurts.
And then I got a text from a porn chick.
Come over and fuck me silly
Did I mention she’s young and sexy?
Well, she is.
And the funny thing - well, the sick thing - is that I didn’t jump in my car […]
FREE PORN OF THE DAY
Monday, March 31st, 2008Visit ModelingMatrix.com to check out today’s free hardcore galleries.
CARMELLA BING RETIRES.. SORT OF
Sunday, March 30th, 2008Remember back in the 1980’s when Supermodel Linda Evangelista said ‘I won’t get out of bed for less than $10,000 a day‘. Well this isn’t quite that over the top, but it is reminiscent of that memorable quote…. according to Carmella Bing, ‘$20,000 a month just isn’t going to cut it for me‘. WOW, hookers […]
2 YEAR ANNIVERSARY FOR CLUBTAYLORRAIN AND CLUBHC NETWORK.. SPECIAL FREE GIVEAWAY
Saturday, March 29th, 2008Free shit is cool, unless it’s a bad case of the crabs from an ugly hooker. Then free shit sucks.
But if you’re getting free porn, now that is a different story altogether, and I suggest you take it unless by “it” you mean a big black dildo in your ass and then I say if […]
HACKER GETS 3 YEARS FOR PHONY CALL
Saturday, March 29th, 2008Orange County, CA. - A Mukilteo man has been sentenced to three years in a California prison for tricking 911 dispatchers into sending a SWAT team to the Orange County home of a randomly selected family.
Randal T. Ellis, 19, was sentenced Thursday in Orange County Superior Court after pleading guilty to felonies including false imprisonment […]
CRAIGSLIST SLAMMED FOR HOSTING PROSTITUTION ADS
Saturday, March 29th, 2008Craigslist, we have a problem. No, not the baby being sold for drug money earlier this week — that was a hoax and the person who placed the ad was arrested.
Not the malicious ad placed last Saturday that left a Jacksonville, Ore., man with a plundered home, recalling a similar incident last May.
The problem […]
THIS IS WHY PEOPLE DON’T PULL OVER TO HELP
Saturday, March 29th, 2008NEW CASTLE, Ind. - A woman who tried to help after a car crash was punched and bitten by the man she was trying to assist, police said. “It was just crazy. I was just trying to help,” 28-year-old Danielle Herndon of New Castle said Wednesday.
Rex Allen Shannon, 21, Middletown, was being held Wednesday night […]
MOTHER BRINGS BABY TO ARMED ROBBERY
Saturday, March 29th, 2008GREENVILLE, S.C. — A woman brought her 4-month-old baby along while she and her boyfriend committed an armed robbery, deputies said.
Investigators said that they initially thought that 20-year-old Sarah Titi Walker was the victim of a kidnapping that happened last week in connection with the robbery of the Abbarrotes La Flor D grocery store on […]
STONERS ARE PEOPLE TOO
Saturday, March 29th, 2008Washington, DC: US Congressman Barney Frank (D-MA) will introduce legislation in Congress to strip the federal government of its authority to arrest responsible cannabis consumers. Representative Frank made the announcement last week on the nationally syndicated television show, “Real Time With Bill Maher.”
“It’s time for the politicians to catch up with the public on this […]
CHARGED WITH HAVING SEX…. WITH A TABLE
Saturday, March 29th, 2008BELLEVUE, OHIO — Police say a man in Bellevue was caught on tape having sex with a picnic table.
Bellevue Police Captain Matt Johnson says Art Price, Jr., 40, was seen on four occasions between the hours of 10:30 a.m. and noon having sex with his picnic table. What makes this a felony, Johnson says, is that it took place […]
JEZEBELLE BOND IS PISSED OFF AT “FAKE JEZEBELLE”
Friday, March 28th, 2008Saw this on myspace. Not sure what it means but Jezebelle is cool so this other chick must not be if Jezebelle is saying she sucks.
the envelop please…
and NADIA JADE WINS!!!!
why does she deserve this monumental award? let’s dive into the reasons, shall we?!
1. SHE’S TOO UGLY TO POST PICTURES OF HERSELF…
yes, it’s true! instead […]
JAMIE LYNN SPEARS PARODY
Friday, March 28th, 2008You just gotta love Hustler! Yeah, not only ’cause they hire me to write awesome articles, but because they have tons of balls and humor.
Oh yeah, and ’cause Larry is a powerful, powerful man.
HUSTLER Magazine’s June 2008 issue ad parody is a surefire hit…right below the belt! Straight on the heels of the teen-pregnancy film […]
POISON’S RIKKI ROCKETT ARRESTED ON RAPE WARRANT
Friday, March 28th, 2008It’s funny ’cause Poison and Warrant were rivals back in the late 80s hair band era, and now the Poison drummer is joining Warrant.
Well, kinda.
So he raped a chick? So what, right? I mean, he’s a fucking rock star and can do whatever he wants to!
Actually, no he can’t.
But I wonder why he would need […]
HOW TO USE YOUR FEDERAL TAX REBATE CHECK
Thursday, March 27th, 2008As you may have heard the Bush Administration said each and every one of us would now get a nice rebate.
If we spend that money at Wal-Mart, all the money will go to China.
If we spend it on gasoline it will all go to the Arabs.
If we purchase a computer it will all […]
OPEN SEASON FOR PEEPING TOMS
Thursday, March 27th, 2008OKLAHOMA CITY — The state House on Thursday will consider a Tulsa legislator’s bill that could help rectify a problem with the law that came to light recently when a suspected “Peeping Tom” in a Target store was freed by a court.
The Oklahoma Court of Criminal Appeals ruled that a charge against a man accused […]
LINES OF MEN ALL WAITING FOR SEX
Thursday, March 27th, 2008Is political correctness stopping police ending the misery of the teenage sex slaves?
By KATHRYN KNIGHT - Daily Mail
Their faces remain shadowy, but Jane clearly remembers the sheer, terrifying numbers of men who would be brought to her bed at night. “It happened every night. There were loads of men involved.” Her voice cracks.
“You couldn’t keep […]
LINDSAY LOHAN JOINING CHARLES MANSON CULT
Thursday, March 27th, 2008from People Magazine: First Mark David Chapman, and now this! Lindsay Lohan, fresh off her big-screen role opposite John Lennon’s killer (aka the chubby Jared Leto) in Chapter 27, has signed up to star in another film about a murderer – this time, it’s Charles Manson.
Lohan, 21, will play one of Manson’s cult followers, Nancy […]
KATE BOSWORTH “SO DRUNK I CANT REMEMBER THE SEX”
Thursday, March 27th, 2008from Access Hollywood
NEW YORK - What happens in Vegas, may stay in Vegas. However, there’s one Sin City memory Kate Bosworth can’t talk about even if she wanted to.
Bosworth revealed she was so drunk while filming a steamy love scene with Jim Sturgess in “21,” she can’t even remember it.
“We were both so drunk,” […]
IMAGES OF SNAKE EYES FROM UPCOMING G.I. JOE MOVIE!
Thursday, March 27th, 2008
A friend of mine sent these over to me, not sure if they’re up anywhere else or not but I haven’t seen them.
Enjoy
LA TIMES APOLOGIZES TO DIDDY
Thursday, March 27th, 2008LOS ANGELES (AP) — The Los Angeles Times apologized for using apparently fabricated documents in a story implying that a 1994 assault on Tupac Shakur was carried out by associates of Sean “Diddy” Combs, and that he knew about it ahead of time.
“The bottom line is that the documents we relied on should not have […]
NEED HELP IN VEGAS
Thursday, March 27th, 2008Okay, so I’m on the road to Vegas to meet up with three lovely ladies and I need a place for us to crash for the night until our hotel suite is ready tomorrow night. Anyone willing to hook a nigga and his bitches up let me know please.
[email protected]
CELEBRITY GOSSIP ROUNDUP
Thursday, March 27th, 2008Paris Hilton is reportedly adding another dog to her collection. The self-declared animal lover — and PETA-criticized pet owner — is planning on adopting a West Highland terrier, according to MSNBC. A former dog-sitter for the heiress is unsupportive of the new addition. “She might like her dogs, but she can’t keep track of them,” […]
HOME REMEDIES
Thursday, March 27th, 20081. If you are choking on an ice cube, don’t panic! Simply pour a cup of boiling water down your throat and presto! The blockage will be almost instantly removed.
2. Are you clumsy? Avoid cutting yourself while slicing vegetables by getting someone else to hold them while you chop away.
3. Avoid arguments with the Mrs […]
PAPARAZZI DEFEND THEIR TRADE
Thursday, March 27th, 2008NEW YORK (AdAge.com) — Some have suggested that the celebrity gossip supernova may finally be cooling off, but don’t try telling that to the king and queen of Hollywood paparazzi. They’re busy building photo archives of Miley Cyrus, 16, in case she becomes the next big moneymaking disaster.
The usually sober Atlantic magazine surprised readers with […]
WILL LUKEFORD.COM HAUNT ME FOREVER?
Thursday, March 27th, 2008I think anyone who has been following me and my rendition of LukeFord.com over the years knows I am no longer invoved with the site. There’s a new guy over there now and it ain’t me.
But I wish he would post under a name so that those who don’t already know I’m gone from there […]
THE LONG WALK
Thursday, March 27th, 2008So I remembered this story from years ago when I was a young tike (and kike) living in Newton, Massachusetts.
This guy Wilkins AKA Stink Bomb (imagine having that nickname growing up?) was getting with some - obvious - skank over at our friend Steve Quinn’s house one weekend night. He got the rubber on, was […]
TODAY IN HISTORY: JESUS CONDEMNED TO DIE
Thursday, March 27th, 2008The great Js all die young — Jim Morrison, Janis Joplin, Jimi Hendrix and Jesus. Jesus H. Christ was born (ironically enough) around five to six years “before Christ” (B.C.) due to a scheduling mixup.
Generally depicted in art as a white guy with blue eyes and dirty blonde hair, the location of Jesus’ […]
JOLIE/PITT BABY PIX WORTH 10 MILLION $$
Thursday, March 27th, 2008New York Post: THERE’S no limit to how much money celebrities are being paid to pimp out their babies in the magazines and tabloids. After paying Christina Aguilera a reported $1.5 million in February for shots of her newborn, Max, People shelled out a whopping $6 million to Jennifer Lopez and Marc Anthony for […]
SMELLS LIKE WEED
Thursday, March 27th, 2008San Francisco: The musty smell of a man’s money led to his arrest on possible drug charges. The 21-year-old Sturgeon Bay man tried to deposit money smelling of marijuana at a bank here last week, according to a Sturgeon Bay police report obtained by the Door County Advocate.
The $4,000 in bundled bills did not smell […]
LISA DANIELS ON SOUTH PARK LAST NIGHT?
Thursday, March 27th, 2008I heard that Lisa Daniels the porn chick was the model for the Heavy Metal cat-piss hallucinations girl on South Park last night but I couldn’t say anything until it aired. I watched the episode. I guess it could have been her; she has big boobs and big hair just like the cartoon chick…
Was it […]
DB COOPERS PARACHUTE FOUND?
Thursday, March 27th, 2008SEATTLE — Hoping to solve at least part of a 36-year-old mystery, the FBI is analyzing a torn, tangled parachute found in southwest Washington to determine if it belonged to famed plane hijacker D.B. Cooper.
Children playing outside their home near Amboy found the chute’s fabric sticking up from the ground in an area where their […]
NEVER TOO OLD!!!!!!!!
Thursday, March 27th, 2008MANATEE COUNTY, FL — Prosecutors have decided to drop a soliciting charge against one of two 93-year-old men who were picked up during recent undercover prostitution stings.
The state, however, will continue to pursue a case against the other elderly man.
Carlos Underhill, 93, will not be charged, although he does not deny stopping to chat with […]
SEXUAL CONTENT LAW
Thursday, March 27th, 2008INDIANA: A new state law that requires sellers of adult material to register with the state has Hoosier bookstore owners fuming about government censorship and threatening a legal challenge.
“This lumps us in with businesses that sell things that you can’t even mention in a family newspaper,” said Ernie Ford, owner of Fine Print Book Store […]
NEW MEANING TO ‘INVASION OF PRIVACY’
Wednesday, March 26th, 2008MIAMI (Reuters) - Miami police could soon be the first in the United States to use cutting-edge, spy-in-the-sky technology to beef up their fight against crime.
A small pilotless drone manufactured by Honeywell International, capable of hovering and “staring” using electro-optic or infrared sensors, is expected to make its debut soon in the skies over the […]
CAN I HOST THE URBAN SPICE AWARDS?
Wednesday, March 26th, 2008I know I’m pretty much as “street” as they come; got the scars to prove it. A killer crack habit as well.
Okay, so here’s the deal.
The Urban Spice Awards has emailed me about their upcoming show on June 8th honoring ethnic adult movies.
Well, that’s awesome and all, but where do I fit in here? I […]
WHEN TEAGAN PRESLEY TALKS PEOPLE LISTEN
Wednesday, March 26th, 2008
I guess this is one of them radio shows you watch on your computer.
What will they think of next? No seriously, I want to know.
Click on the picture to go to the web site which will be conducting the interview with Teagan. I hope he asks her about porn.
Anyway, it should be a fun time […]
TWEAK FOR BABY…NOW THAT IS A GOOD TRADE!
Wednesday, March 26th, 2008I’m not sure what to say about this. So I won’t say a thing.
PORTLAND, Ore. — Police in Portland are investigating an ad posted on the popular Web site Craigslist featuring a baby for sale for $1,000.
The ad shows a baby covered in food or mud being held by an adult. Text with the ad […]
HAPPY BIRTHDAY LA BELLA!
Wednesday, March 26th, 2008There was once a time when I believed with all my heart and soul that Taylor Rain would end up killing any dog she got her hands on within the first year. It almost happened with Dick Bandit a few times, but luckily a pit bull can take a lot of pain. Smokie, the same.
But […]
A MAN WHO WAS ONCE A WOMAN IS NOW PREGNANT
Wednesday, March 26th, 2008Okay, so there’s a chick in Oregon who says she had a sex change to become a man.
Normal, right? I guess so…
But now that woman/man, Thomas Beatie, has announced that she/he is now 22 weeks pregnant. Apparently, the sex change only included new boobs and testosterone therapy. When he/she stopped taking injections, he/she was able to […]
WHO DOES ALAURA EDEN LOVE ON AMERICAN IDOL?
Tuesday, March 25th, 2008It’s boring out here in the Valley. We watch a lot of television.
Like American Idol. I think its fun watching people’s dreams crushed on national television. But not former adult star Alaura Eden; she’s a fan of the show, and of one contestant in particular.
Which contestant is that? you ask.
One Carly Smithson.
So Alaura is in […]
SHERYL CROW JOINING FLEETWOOD MAC?
Tuesday, March 25th, 2008Anyone who knows me knows I love Fleetwood Mac. I named both my dogs after Stevie songs. Sure, its gay, but I remember all them years ago I was gonna name Rhiannon “Mmmm Bop” after the Hanson song. That would have been really gay! I think I made the right choice.
So Fleetwood Mac has only […]
LOOK OUT TMZ
Tuesday, March 25th, 2008TMZ – which stands for “Thirty Mile Zone” the supposed area around Los Angeles where most celebrities live – has managed to take celebrity gossip to the next level. Combining the sensibilities of an Entertainment Tonight or Extra with the low standards and frequent updates of a Perez Hilton, the organization has nearly conquered the […]
WHICH CAME FIRST, THE DOUCHEBAG OR THE TRANNY FUCKER?
Tuesday, March 25th, 2008So I’ve been reading on Adult FYI lately about this war between sex performers Donny Long and Christian XXX over whose name is more stupid. Actually, there’s a little more to it than that.
Christian XXX has always been friendly towards me, as I have to him. He seems like a nice guy. But he reportedly does […]
ONLINE GOSSIP SITE TARGETED
Tuesday, March 25th, 2008SACRAMENTO - A Fremont lawmaker asked the attorney general today to investigate online gossip sites that critics say are hurtful and dangerous because they allow users to anonymously spread the kind of attacks once found only on bathroom walls.
Assemblyman Alberto Torrico, D-Fremont, cited JuicyCampus.com, which has expanded to include the University of California, Berkeley, and […]
FACEBOOK GETS FACEFUCKED
Tuesday, March 25th, 2008The online social networking site Facebook says it has fixed a security loophole discovered by a Vancouver computer technician that allowed people to look at the private photos of users.The news follows Facebook Inc.’s announcement last week that it was implementing tougher measures to allow members to restrict access to their personal profiles.
But Byron Ng, […]
IT’S A GIRL
Tuesday, March 25th, 2008
I think almost every woman wants to have a girl!!!! I know I did!!! My sis is the exception she wants all boys…. weird!!! I am so happy, I found out on Friday morning with my sis and Keith. They did a detailed ultrasound (level 2), so we can see if there is going to […]
NUDE PEOPLE HAVE BEEF WITH PAYPAL
Tuesday, March 25th, 2008After four years of processing subscription payments for Going Natural magazine, PayPal has abruptly cancelled service to its publisher, the Federation of Canadian Naturists (FCN). Attempts to get an explanation as to how the magazine violates PayPal’s “acceptable use” policy have been met with generic e-mails from faceless and implacable customer-service personnel.
Those e-mails falsely claim […]
FREE XXX OF THE DAY
Tuesday, March 25th, 2008Flower Tucci Solo
Flower Tucci Anal & Squirting with Lee Stone
Gabriella Banks Solo
Gabriella Banks Solo fetish
Genesis Skye Pretty girl
Genesis Skye Solo outside
Gianna Michaels Solo big tit model
Gianna Michaels & Mysti May 3 way hardcore
GiGi Giving a Handjob
GiGi Solo
Hailey Paige Boxcover shots
Hailey Paige & Tyla Wynn […]
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